My Self-Love Top 10

votewithmyfeet

As the Dalai Lama said, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.” I believe he was not just talking about being kind to others, I believe he was talking about being kind to yourself. Kindness has been very much on my mind lately and I’m trying to live what I’m learning and practice what I’m preaching. I’m trying.

Lately life has been a strategic game of priorities vs. enjoyment. I’m trying to get all the important stuff done while still including some fun for myself, not always an easy task. Truth be told, none of this is possible if the self that you use to perform all of these life tasks is not functioning at optimal levels. We need to keep self-kindness at the forefront in order to accomplish anything else. So, for that reason, consider the things that you do to take care of yourself. I try very hard to not allow the self-care items on my daily to-do list be the things that get ignored when time is running short. Always make time for yourself. Always.

So what do you do to show yourself love? Here are some simple things that I do to show kindness to myself that make a big impact on my ability to feel at peace. Because when I feel angry, sad or disappointed, I’m not as likely to show myself any kindness. It’s an ongoing circle and balancing act of kindness, responsibility and effort.

Here are the top 10 things that I try and do for myself everyday…

1. I drink water. I try to drink as much water as I can everyday. The days that I don’t make it a priority, my body feels different and I always regret it.

2. I breathe. I never hesitate to take a moment and just breathe for a bit. I stop what I’m doing, fill my lungs with air and let it out slowly. Breathe. 

3. I play. Whether it’s with my dog, my kids or just being silly with a friend, I always feel better when I let loose and just play for a while.

4. I say no. I don’t let guilt get in the way of allowing myself to say no if I feel like it. I don’t always have to have a good reason, I just have to give myself permission to not do everything.

5. I unplug. I like to put my phone on silent and turn it over so I’m not tempted to check it. Unplugging leads to being present, and being present leads to enjoying the moment.

6. I sleep. 7-8 hours. Every night. Period.

7. I say thank you. When someone does something nice for me, whether it’s big or small, I make sure and say thank you. I make sure and show that I am grateful.

8. I speak my truth. I’m not one to mince words, I tell it like it is. Speaking my truth makes me feel good.

9. I eat mindfully. I pay attention to when and what I’m eating and I make a major effort to be as healthy as possible. It often takes a bit of extra effort, and sometimes self-control, but in the end it’s worth it to pay attention to what I put in my body.

10. I vote with my feet. When I am present it means I want to be there and it shows people that I care enough to make an effort. I show up. Excuses are easy, but when I know it really matters, I make an effort to be there.

What’s on your list? Have you done any of them today? There is still time, but now is the best time. Now.

gratitude to 5demayo for the perfect photo from morguefile.com to show how lucky we are to be able to vote with our feet

Change the Channel

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I accept personal responsibility.  I accept blame.  Even if I had been blindly guided into each decision that has led me to today, I still indict myself for every choice.  I’m not any worse off than my neighbor and I never got a bum deal.  It’s all perspective and it’s all in my head.  Taking an honest assessment of my strengths and making an effort to sort through my weaknesses keeps me in check.  If I am to find happiness, I need to be willing to give up on blame.  I need to stop giving away my power and take responsibility for my own life and my own choices.  The consequences give me wisdom to grow, change and learn from all that I experience.  The consequences are what help me survive and motivate me to stay my course on this journey.

So what am I supposed to do with all this disappointment?  Harboring disappointment will never lead to happiness.  I seem to feel disappointed when others fall short of my expectations, so again, it’s ultimately my responsibility to keep my expectations in line with reality.  And then there is regret.  I am accountable for my own choices and therefore must direct the blame inward when a personal choice does not meet a positive outcome.  The disappointment about the outcome itself should only be a lesson, not a source of stress.  My energy is better focused on finding healthy ways to avoid poor decision making by using more careful analysis.  Always thinking that the glass will remain half full no matter what happens is a fool’s fallacy.

Then again, when I have a win, I can feel fully empowered while I take my victory lap with my fists pumping and my smile wide.  Positivity is a skill to be mastered and must be attained with mindfulness.  The world doesn’t owe me any favors and I’m ok with that.  I take pride in working hard for what I achieve.  Fulfillment is like a warm shower after a long run…sometimes that’s the best part.

The running diatribe of others that I hear means that I’m listening to the wrong source.  It’s not my burden to bear, it’s my choice to change the channel.  Even static in between the stations is better than negativity.

Better yet….unplug.

Aside

myhappypromise

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